meadows vs bodegas

since deciding to move to nyc, friends and family members have questioned this decision. they just don't get it. and that's fine. i don't really get it either. i know i love it there. i know i (sometimes) hate it here. but with me it's somewhat of a catch 22 because i love the hustle and bustle, the millions of strangers, the ability to get everywhere you need to go by foot or through the use of public transportation. but, at the same time, i LOVE a big front porch, a lawn to lie in, camping, hiking, staring at the stars while having a somewhat philosophical discussion with anyone who will join in. so WHY move to the cluster fuck that is nyc?

i came across this article of why the author chooses to stay in the country. so, to clear up the confusion for those of you who wonder why the fuck i would want to move to a place like nyc, i will respond to each of his reason's for keeping it rural. maybe that will get you off my back.

Elbow Room

Living in a fishbowl is comforting to some, claustrophobic to others. Ask urbanites why they flee the city for the country and most will cite the reason folks like me have never left: open space. Ironically, open space is disappearing at an astonishing rate as people rush to grab their share of it. Despite that, there's still enough elbow room to easily walk in the woods with the dog, cross-country ski or sled with the kids, or run to the clothes line bare-assed before work—all, and more, because out here you can.

i don't really care about elbow room, unless we are talking about in my bed. most places that i like to hang out bring about a crowd, so i have just gotten used to it. if elbow room was that big of an issue i would never again attend a football game or concert, or go to a bar. not to mention, the adirondacks are not far at all. i can hop on a train and meet up with friends any time i feel overwhelmed by the shoulder to shoulder.

Slower Pace

You can tell someone's from the city by the way they drive. If they're on your bumper, bearing down, it's a dead giveaway that they're “not from around here,” or at least are carrying metro-baggage. On the old roads that rarely see traffic, you really can slow it down, take it all in. What, after all, is the rush?

i can't fucking stand the slower pace. the slower pace is for people who need walkers. it's not always that you are in a rush, just that there are thousands of things you could be doing other than driving your car behind someone in their old-ass ford truck who is winding down the 2 lane road slow enough to pass on bicycle.

Neighborliness

With so many stores, public transportation, and hired help nearby, urbanites have nearly everything they need to live "independently." And even in the country, as technology creeps into our lives, more than ever people can drive right by their neighbors without ever knowing them. But when the chips are down, when the car is in the ditch, when you run out of firewood, when the power's out and you need a shower, it's your neighbor helping you out. You know them out here, probably because you've had to be there for each other numerous times, and will be many times again.

neighbors are what you make of them. i live in an apartment building uptown, reminiscent of a college dorm. i like to keep a distance, but when i am locked out, no one ever spits on my face because we live in an urban environment. and i like to keep neighbors at a distance anyway...if you let them get to close they will be at your door with every excuse in the book (um, i need a bobby pin) just because their nosey asses want a glimpse into your life. next thing you know (in this rural area with one church and one bar) the fact that you answered the door on a tuesday night with a glass of whiskey on the rocks will be turned into soap opera drama. it will be accompanied by hushed whispers and dirty looks each time you walk into the fucking grocery store. my grandmother used to tell us shit about people we had never seen before...ugh.

Air Quality

Sure, if you have pollen allergies and/or the smell of cow manure offends, maybe country life is not all deep breaths. But medical studies show that asthmatics fair much better withdrawn from urban environs, where vehicle pollution contributes to respiratory difficulty and a host of other problems. Breathe enough of our clean air—agricultural or natural smells aside—and you're bound to get used to it, especially when you open your windows to welcome a morning or evening breeze.

i will die tomorrow of an asthma attack before i will ever live somewhere that a cow-shit farm is in my nose's reach. and i have my window open right now...the breeze is wonderful.

Setting

Norman Rockwell has left the building, but his ideal of country life didn't expire with him. So long as rolling fields speckled with livestock or laid over with waving wheat remain, so too does the simple lifestyle built around them—or at least the illusion of that lifestyle. Enough so that aside from the cell phone in their pockets anchoring them to modern reality, country people can still fake being backwater. While texting the grocery list from home, of course.

when i think of the country setting i think of simple (minded) people. i know this is not always the case...but i like to walk outside and be on a sidewalk and mosey around uptown and have my choice of everything to do. driving 20 miles to the nearest grocery store, bar, or friend's house would drive me nutty-not to mention probably result in a dui. plus, people, no matter how fucking ignorant or brilliant, intrigue me. too much alone time (and i strictly mean time by myself, not time without a partner or friend) makes me crazy.

Star Gazing

Having trouble picking out Orion from Soldier Field? Where I live, the houselights across the valley sometimes blend right in with the stars, and most clear nights we can see the full band of the Milky Way.

this is his best argument as far as i am concerned. but it's just like the beach. when i lived there i walked to the ocean every single day, but it wasn't as fascinating as it had been my whole life. now, going to the beach to see friends is fun and more exciting than going to see land-locked friends because i don't get to enjoy the beach every day.

Crime

It's a problem everywhere, and meth and other drug-related violence is on the rise in rural America. Still you're more likely to get hit by lightning than be mugged while taking a nightly stroll down a moonlit dirt road. And even if you were to get hit, you'd spend a lot less time worrying about it beforehand.

if i was worried about crime i would live my life in a cinder block home with no windows and no doors, and then i would die within a week or so. and the really nutty fucks live in rural areas too...i would rather be mugged than throw into a cellar and forced to live off my toenails and dog urine while some psycho raped me thursday.

Roots

Roots are the real reason I'm here. My daughters are the eighth generation to live on our defunct farm. For some reason, it seems, roots penetrate better in warm earth than in concrete. The same goes for newcomers to the country. After all these millennia, it's somehow more permanent to make a stand in the dirt than in a 12th-story townhouse. But that's just my take.

i guess i should move to brooklyn or italy if it's a case of where your roots are. well, my dad grew up in the south but his parents are dead and they totally lived that extreme rural life on a farm that i can't stand.